Are We Decoding Our Feelings Correctly?

  

Trying To Put Language On A Stream Of Excited Neurons

   “Are We Decoding Our Feelings Correctly?”

    There are moments when something in us awakens before we even have the chance to put a single word to it. When the amygdala fires, it doesn’t speak our language at all — there is no language. Instead, it sends out a silent tremor, a raw current that rushes through us and can nudge our behaviour quite strongly without asking permission. Later on, the prefrontal cortex tries to step in, attempting to tidy the mess and regain control, to give some shape to the chaos — but the truth is, decoding our own feelings is still our job.

To face this challenge, the hippocampus, that quiet archivist of memories, can step forward with old scenes and old lessons, hoping to help us understand what just happened.

But the truth is… feelings are often misunderstood. At least, I misunderstand mine often enough. And when that happens, our behaviour can twist in unexpected directions — in small moments of everyday life, or in our interactions with people who mean something to us.

Who hasn’t acted strangely because a feeling pushed them to do so? Anger that fogs everything, frustration that bites at the edges of our thoughts, love that blinds us, or even that ridiculous state of being hangry which makes the world feel unfair for no good reason. It sounds silly, but it happens.

So I wonder: are we decoding our feelings correctly — or even remotely close? I dare say… probably not at all.

We crave putting words to feelings, as if naming them cleans them, softens them, makes them acceptable to ourselves and to society. But the moment we push a feeling through the fine filters of social language and expectation, perhaps what comes out is no longer the true thing. Maybe the original feeling had a wildness we’ll never fully know again.

Is this necessarily bad? I don’t think so — I daresay that in many cases it’s even good for society. Feelings are wild creatures: sudden, instinctive, uninvited. They burst into the room and we are left to deal with them — ignore them, distort them, fight them, misunderstand them… or learn from them. We cannot choose when a feeling arrives, but we can choose how we decode it, and how much importance we let it take.

And maybe that’s what truly shapes our daily lives: not the raw feeling itself, but how we translate it… and how we try, imperfectly, to fit it into the world we live in.

Toni Font, Aberdeen 03/12/2025

Big Family Anatomy

 

Big Family Anatomy

   Barnis’ pub was unusually quiet that snowy afternoon. Gary pushed the door open, shaking the snow off his coat like a dog after a bath. The school meeting was cancelled thanks to the weather, and without anything better to do, he ordered a drink.

That’s when he saw Josephine — an old university friend he hadn’t seen in seven years or so. They greeted each other with the polite enthusiasm reserved for people you genuinely like but have completely lost track of.

After catching up on careers, failed hobbies, and the universal disappointment of adulthood, the conversation slipped naturally into personal territory.

-Josephine: I’ve always wondered what it must be like growing up with many siblings. Not like me — I’m an only child.

-Gary: Well, I can’t tell you if it’s better or worse. But I can tell you it’s... busy. Your life feels protected, yes, but also shared with so many people that your “sense of originality” sometimes runs away. You spend years trying to find where you fit in the crowd.

-Josephine: And does each sibling fall into a specific role? Like a pattern?

Gary smiled, as if she had just asked him his favourite topic.

-Gary: So… I can only speak from my own experience — we’re eight siblings — but my uncles used to talk about something like that. They insisted there’s a sort of cycle that repeats itself every three siblings.

-Josephine: A cycle? Like what?

-Gary: Think of sleep cycles.

-Josephine: Sleep cycles?

Gary leaned back, preparing for one of his explanations — the kind he sincerely enjoyed and others politely endured.

-Gary: Yes! I mean, as an example, so, you know how people think sleep is one long stretch of deep unconsciousness? But it’s not. We go through repeating stages: light sleep, deep sleep, REM… about four or five cycles per night. Each cycle has similar phases — the order repeats, but the intensity changes. So in a big family, according to my uncles, siblings also go through “roles” that repeat in cycles. Not scientifically proven, of course! But a fun analogy.

-Josephine: I see. Go on before I get lost again.

-Gary: Right, sorry — my students also complain when I go off-track. So, the firstborn of each cycle is the natural authority. Whether they like it or not, they’re the reference point. They’re respected — and nobody wants to test the consequences of not respecting them.

Then comes the second. They still have some of that authority, but not all the privileges of the first. So they work harder, become resourceful, and more strategic.

Then the third. According to my uncles, this one is the artistic, independent type — a bit allergic to hierarchies, but with just enough distance from the top to develop their own style.

And then the fourth? The cycle resets. The fourth is too far from the original “power source,” so they grow up freer, less loaded with responsibility, and a little detached from the upper ranks. And then… the seventh behaves like a firstborn again, the eighth like a second, and so on.

Gary paused as if he had just explained the theory of relativity.

-Josephine: Do you actually believe that?

-Gary: Not really. Individuals' personalities are much stronger than any pattern. But… sometimes these things happen subtly, the way clichés sometimes hold a grain of truth. They’re just shapes we notice. Nothing more.

-Josephine: Makes sense. And anyway, big families have so many variables — environment, money, personality, the decade someone is born in…

-Gary: Exactly. The “cycle” is just an amusing way my uncles used to explain the chaos.

They both laughed. Outside, the snow continued falling, silent and soft. Inside, the pub felt warm — the kind of warmth that comes from old friends, old memories, and harmless theories about life that, somehow, help make sense of it all.

Toni Font, Aberdeen 19/11/2025

The Enigma

 

The Enigma

   In every learning journey, there is a mysterious threshold — a moment when some students drift away, as if a silent wind had swept them from the path of understanding. This point of disconnection is often born from two colliding forces: the teacher who struggles to guide the transition to a higher level, and the student who hesitates to rise to the challenge. Between these two edges — like the fine line between light and shadow — many minds linger in uncertainty, watching knowledge fade into the distance like a receding shore.

One of the clearest examples of this threshold is the 2×2 Contingency Table — a small box of logic that appears simple yet conceals a quiet labyrinth within. You can explain it slowly, carefully; your audience nods, it makes sense — until it doesn’t. Because this table, unlike a mere 1 + 1 = 2, asks for something more: a spark of abstraction, the courage to think beyond the surface. Each time you face one, you must not only see but know what you are looking for, and then — through the patient unfolding of reasoning — interpret the grid’s hidden meaning.

Those who do not play this mental game regularly may find it daunting, almost like trying to read a spell in an ancient language. It is not that the formula itself is difficult — it is that the mind must move in two dimensions at once. The table becomes an enigma.

Take, for instance, a simple example from Signal Detection Theory, in which participants must click “Y” when they perceive a signal and “N” when they do not perceive its:

	Signal Present	Signal Absent
Response: “Yes” (Signal Detected)	Hit	False Alarm
Response: “No” (Signal Not Detected)	Miss	Correct Rejection

At first glance, it feels easy — clear, almost elegant. Yet within it lies a duality: signal versus response, presence versus absence. The mind must wander through both axes simultaneously, discerning what is real and what is illusion. Perhaps that is why such models belong more to the calm, orderly world of laboratories than to the unpredictable rhythm of life. Each time you interpret one, it’s as if you are solving a riddle whispered by logic itself.

And then there is another example — one that draws us deeper into the twilight of statistical reasoning: the Table of Type I and Type II Errors.

	Reality: Null True	Reality: Null False
Decision: Reject H₀	Type I Error (False Positive)	Correct (True Positive)
Decision: Fail to Reject H₀	Correct (True Negative)	Type II Error (False Negative)

Here we enter a shadowland where scientists must gamble with uncertainty. They draw a fragile boundary — traditionally at 0.05 — meaning a 5% chance of crying wolf when no wolf is truly there. Imagine a courtroom where you agree to convict an innocent person once in every twenty trials, simply because perfection is impossible and a line must be drawn somewhere in the sand.

This is the Type I Error — declaring something real when it is only a phantom. But lower that threshold too far, and you risk blindness to what genuinely exists: the Type II Error, where you miss the real signal, letting the wolf slip silently past under the moonlight.

Probabilities dance like ghosts around this 0.05 border — a delicate truce between credulity and skepticism, where truth and illusion weave into one another. To those who do not visit this realm often, its logic can feel elusive, as though the numbers hide a riddle only persistence can unlock. It is a place where no choice is perfect, only less wrong.

And that, perhaps, is the true enigma of learning. Those who embrace the mystery grow wiser; those who resist may lose the trail for good. In the end, the humble 2×2 Contingency Table is more than a pedagogical tool — it is a mirror of the human mind: two dimensions, infinite interpretations, and a quiet reminder that understanding is never given, only earned through the courage to think beyond the obvious.

Toni Font, Aberdeen 09/11/2025